Here’s something you need to know about your brain and the brains of the people you live with and work with..
Like the GPS in your car, your brain contains a Search and Find function. Before you head somewhere in your car, first you must enter the details of the location you wish to reach… in your mind and in your GPS… the city, house number, street and the zip.
When you head for a destination in life, you must do the same thing. Before you begin taking action, you must the first enter the precise sensory details of the experience you want to have. Then when the details coming in through your senses match, you’ll know “You’ve arrived.” You’ve successfully created the experience you wanted.
A word of caution… not all of the destinations we enter in our internal GPS are really where we want to go. All too often, we unconsciously program destinations we don’t want to reach… fears, failures, arguments, upsets… mistakenly thinking that our brain will somehow magically translate that “don’t want” into what we “do want” instead. But our brain can’t and won’t and so we keep “arriving at the same unwanted destinations” again and again… job situations we dislike, relationship issues we don’t want. And, instead of taking responsibility for our role in getting there, we blame fate, bad luck or other people.
And we mistakenly program what we don’t want in other people’s brains too… our spouses’ and friends’, our employees’ and kids’ … don’t be late, don’t play with matches, don’t drink and drive, like don’t forgot to call… believing our strongly stated “negative instruction” will head them in a positive direction. But it won’t. And here’s why…
Like it or not. we have a Positive Command Brain
To the human brain, all statements are positive. All statements are based on sensory input. Don’t think about a hot fudge sundae immediately requires you to think about a hot fudge sundae, that scoop of luscious ice cream, the warm chocolate dripping down the sides. “Not” is ignored so the sensory words can be processed and understood. But hopefully you remember the “not” quickly enough to think about what else you could eat… a crunchy apple or your favorite healthy bar.
So if you hear yourself saying “I don’t want”, you need to quickly catch your mistake and turn your instruction around…” I want”… then, with s positive destination in mind, your inner computer will begin programming steps to get there. Instead of “don’t play” with matches, we need to say “do play” with your new video game. Don’t drink and drive needs to become… if you choose to drink, select a designated driver to take you home safely.
What positive destinations do you have in your life? What negative destinations do you need to rethink, pre-experience and take appropriate action to enjoy.
Are you as clear about the details of your dreams as you are about the destinations you enter in you GPS? From now on remember this…
What you think is what you get, like it or not.
So make sure you think about what you do want… instead of what you don’t want.
And make sure you communicate what you want in detail too.
Then your brain will direct you, and others, there and, like your car’s GPS, it will suggest alternate routes when obstacles occur. Recalculating… recalculating…
Something else life-changing for 2019
Take some time to consider this life-changing question: Are the destinations you have in mind really your destinations? Or, are they destinations other people have in mind for you… your parents’, your teacher’s, your bosses’, your spouse’s. Are they destinations you never wanted before, and don’t want now either?
It’s time to grab the steering wheel of your life, reset your Internal GPS, and drive and arrive where you really want to be! Where you will find the joy of success!
c) Susan Ford Collins firstname.lastname@example.org
* For more on Self-Confidence, read Skill 1 in The Joy of Success and Our Children Are Watching.
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Listen to Caroline Dowd-Higgins interview Susan Ford Collins on Your Working Life.